There Is Nothing Worse Than...

I have a special saying that some might say is harsh but I promise only comes out of love. That saying is: There is nothing worse than a closeted nerd.

I say this because I have seen it time and time again. Someone who loves something but buries it because it isn't "cool" or doesn't want to get made fun of. Believe me I get it, no one wants to get laughed at. But no one wants to hide there passions either. After all, our passions and hobbies are often what make us the happiest. Today, we are doing another hybrid of a post, mixing together the approach of The Mess with the topic of Nerdom.

Yesterday, I was on a video call with my cousin Chelsea. She was one of the first people who heavily influenced my pursuit of anime. Now if you have not been with My Mess from the beginning, I highly encourage you checking out our very first article "Grand Opening: I Talk About The Birth Of My Nerdom". This article explains how I found and fell in love with anime as well as other nerdy things. I also mention in that article that though my parents didn't get it, they still supported me and my nerdy pursuits. I was very blessed that way, I am not blind to that for even a moment. In fact, I was even more blessed because I had an older cousin who was also a nerd and could help show me new things. While talking to Chelsea yesterday, discussing a series that I will be writing about in the near future, she brought up a time where she stopped watching anime because she felt it was time "to be an adult". She talked about that time period in a very sad way, when she saw my face she laughed and said, "Don't worry, I don't think that way anymore!"

I didn't ask any questions at the time but it got me to thinking how hard that must have been. Because being an adult is hard on its own, but to be an adult that has to push down the things that bring them joy must be even harder. It made me think of a friend/mentee my husband and I had back in college. They were in their senior year in high school and dealing with a lot of pressures, most of which they were putting on them self. He loved reading and was a huge Harry Potter fan, but he strongly believed that others would never accept that about him because he was jock that had a lot of eyes on him for his current winning streak. We watched helplessly as he split himself in two believing that he could not possibly be both, "jock and nerd". He doesn't talk about books anymore. Ironically, while I was thinking of all of this, someone approached me with a problem they were having with a work acquaintance. Their work acquaintance was, as they described "a complete nerd" who was experiencing a really hard time thanks to his co-workers. His solution was to try to bury those qualities in order to get a long better "with the guys". It has come so far now that it seems the only solution he has found himself left with, is to get a new job.

All these stories and more, I hear them all the time. We have been celebrating here on My Mess that there is no better time to be a nerd. Because to be a nerd is considered a little more mainstream now. It's quirky and cute. And I still stand by the fact that things are much better than they used to be. But there are some people who still have a hard time being themselves without being faced by some sort of judgement, stigma, or guilt. Some push past it like my cousin Chelsea, who is someone I greatly admire and look up to. I was extremely happy to hear her talk about anime's she's watching and book's she's reading. I am hoping that the gentleman from my third example does get that new job and finds the freedom Chelsea did. I also hope that some day, our friend will find that he is a complex being who is allowed to have as many interests as he likes. I hope he finds joy in being his self and I also hope he picks up a book again. Because there is nothing worse than be a closed nerd. There is nothing worse than not getting to be yourself and love the things you do without restriction. I don't care how old you are, you want to watch anime? Watch it. Read as many books as you can. Play your video game, buy that comic book, make that cosplay, do what makes you happy! Because a happy you, a passionate you, is the best you, you can give to the world.

Nerd can mean a lot of different things, but to me its is always going to mean someone who loves their interests without compromise. We compromise a lot of things in this world, don't compromise the things that bring you joy. And if you have, take them back. You deserve to have things in this life that you enjoy and make you excited to keep going. Be the most honest you, you can be and let me be the first to say, "Welcome, to Nerdom."

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Thank you for joining me for this rant of a post here on Nerdom. I hope each and every one of you gets to do something today that puts a smile on your face, and if not let's make that a goal for tomorrow. I wish the best to each and everyone of you, I hope your week is going well and you are all safe and healthy. I will be back with you this Sunday for The Mess but in the mean time, make sure you stay safe, stay nerdy, and stay messy my friends.

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Special Shout Out:

Happy 48th Anniversary to my Grandma and Grandpa! I love you both and hope you have a peaceful and relaxing day today. Know we are celebrating you and your love on the other side of the country!